Hope For Children

We used the adoption agency, Hope For Children, to adopt our beautiful little girl. We are so grateful to this agency for all of their help and support during this journey. When I first moved to Atlanta 12 years ago, I was introduced to this agency through the church I was attending. Steve and I both volunteered at their annual golf-a-thons (and many of our family members pledged $...thank you), and helped in many other ways. Who would have known, that 12 years later, we would actually be using them to adopt our own child! We are grateful to Dave, the director and founder of HFC for his heart for children and especially adoption. Every time I look at Danielle, I feel blessed. I cannot tell you how well she is doing! Even though she has been with us for a little more than a month, it seems like she has always been a part of us. I am so grateful that God put adoption on our hearts - I can't imagine not having Danielle in our family...she is a perfect addition! It also warms my heart to see children who need families, to find one. I have posted a picture that is very dear to me - it is a picture of Danielle and 3 little girls that were all on the same Waiting Child list. All of these little girls were on "the List" that came out on April 30th, and they all have families now! Praise God! I write this, because I want you to realize how incredible adoption is - it is truly from God! Please, follow this link to our agencies website, http://www.hopeforchildren.org/index.htm and watch the video on the lower left corner of their homepage. Thank you and Happy New Year!

Check out my Slide Show!

Danielle is doing GREAT!

I am sorry that I haven't given any updates sooner...but life is definitely busier having 3 children under the age of 4! Danielle couldn't be doing better! She is such a delight and a wonderful addition to our family. She is sleeping in her own crib in her own room by herself! No more tears at bedtime, and she doesn't cry for her foster family anymore. We still let her look at pictures of her foster family, but instead of crying, she smiles and says, "Mama". I am her mommy, but her foster mom will always be her Mama. Meg (Steve's sister who was with us in China) is going to send a letter from us to Danielle's orphanage with updated pictures of Danielle and a request for pictures of the rest of her foster family. Please pray that we can obtain these photos - they will mean a lot to Danielle when she gets older. Speaking of Meg, she is in the States for a few weeks and we were able to spend a couple of wonderful hours with her and her boyfriend yesterday! It was so good to see her again...I really have missed her! What we didn't expect was Danielle's reaction...as soon as she saw Meg, she burst into tears! Not tired or angry tears, but sad and scared tears! We were totally surprised, but it makes sense...Meg was there when we first received Danielle, and she was the one who tried to comfort her by talking in Chinese. Also, Meg left us a little over 48 hours after we got Danielle, and she was at the peak of her grieving. Poor little Danielle! She was probably afraid that she was going to be taken away again. It was hard to see Danielle cry like that again - it was just like how she cried in Nanning. The good news is, she didn't cry for very long, and after only about 10 minutes, she began warming up to Meg, and by the end of her visit, Meg was holding Danielle and they were both smiling! Praise God!
Besides a wonderful time with Meg, we had a wonderful Christmas! We ejoyed spending lots of time together with family and friends. Danielle has been doing amazing! She is very social but still knows who her parents are and is really attaching well to us all. Last night at Nana's, she was looking at pictures of Stephanie, and was trying to say her name! She is smart as a whip! We have been teaching her signs and she picks them up after showing her only once. We are also seeing more of her personality. She seems to be use to being the little princess of the family, and she is having a little trouble understanding that we have 3 princesses here. She loves to look at pictures of herself and gets into everything imaginable. We thought that our house was childproof, but we are finding out that it is not!
We are so grateful that God has blessed us with such a beautiful little girl! She truly makes our family complete! We love how she fits right in with us - she is a blessing...all of our girls are blessings. We hope that all of you had a wonderful Christmas! Our love to you all!

Tanski Family transitioning well!

Danielle is transitioning really well into her forever family. She is holding her own with her 2 older sisters and they are adapting to her. We have had some sharing issues, but what do you expect with a 4, 2 and 1 year old! Lots of toys are going into time out, but other than that, things are going well. Danielle is already sleeping through the night! For the first few nights, she woke up around 11 and wiggled in her bed and played her music box until about 1 am, but she has slept good otherwise. On Saturday, she slept in until 11:30 am until I finally had to wake her up! She still took a nap and went to bed that night - what a good girl. She still cries when we try to put her to sleep, but after a little bit of cuddle, she rolls over into her crib (which is next to our bed) and goes to sleep. She is kind of a light sleeper, but hopefully that will change after living in our loud house! We are truly amazed at the difference a few weeks make! I have often heard how resilient these little kids are, but I had no idea what a joy she would so quickly become! I mean, I have always loved her, but it was hard to see her grieving and I would not have imagined that she would accept us so quickly. I am so grateful, though - God truly answers prayers! We do have to work a little on her shopping skills - she is not too thrilled to sit in carts for a long time. Hopefully when we go to the store without sisters it will be better - on our first trip to Target, Danielle and Liz had it out a bit - Liz is meeting her match!! But Liz is also very sweet to her - I really think that they will all get along well. Oh! Yesterday, Stephanie informed us that she now wants a brother - she wants 4 kids in the family she said. Then, we had TLC on last night and she saw the show "Jon and Kate Plus 8" where a couple, through fertility treatments, had twin girls, and then 3 or 4 years later tried again, and had sextuplets! The show is about their life with twin 6 year olds and 6 3 year-olds!! Stephanie then changed her mind and said she wanted 8 kids!! Good grief!!! Even though things are going well, I am not sure that I could handle that many - right now I am completely content with 3!! I will be even happier when we get our schedule all worked out!! We are surviving, but are grateful that my mom is still here - we will see what happens on Thursday when she goes home!!!

Finally...pictures!

Back in the USA

Praise the Lord! We are back on US soil! When we landed in Detroit on Wed. afternoon, I was sure that someone out of our group (Steve and I and the Miller family) would kiss the ground! We probably would have if we weren't being rushed through customs! We arrived back in Atlanta at 6 pm on Wed, and after stopping off for some Chinese take-out (yes, you heard right), we finally made it to the comfort of our own home and our 2 little ones! Steve and I cried after seeing Steffi and Liz - it felt so good to hold them in our arms! Liz has grown - she is a little girl now! They both welcomed Danielle willingly, and all of them were playing together within minutes - what a sight to see! Oh, I wanted to let you all know how well Danielle did on the flight. We were totally dreading the return trip home, but she was great! She took some good naps and ate well - things couldn't have gone better! We were surely blessed. Danielle is already making her mark in the family - her grieving has all but disappeared and she is laughing, goofing off and running all over the house as if she has lived here forever. Liz is a little selfish with me, which I expected, but they are working things out - Danielle can sure hold her own! Danielle has also done well with the time change - she has only woken up twice each night and goes back to bed after a bottle and a little looking around. She is awake and playing during the day - we are starting to get on schedule...except that she has been sleeping in until 10 am! Can you believe it - that is NOT typical Tanski child behavior - but we love it!! Actually, Liz has been sleeping in until 9 am - grandparents must have worn her out! In fact, my dad and niece left this morning - a whole day early. They said that they wanted to give us space, but I think that they were too tired to keep up! My mom will be staying here until Thurs - and I am grateful for that! We ventured out to Target today - boy, 3 kids sure is interesting! We got everything done, but I can tell you that I will be running errands on days when 1 and 2 are in school!! I am sorry that I haven't posted anything for a while - the last few days in China were very busy, 2 travel days and yesterday I was just exhausted! I also had to be available to 3 little ones who were trying to get use to things! I do want to thank you all for your love, prayer and support - we are all doing well, and hopefully we will be able to introduce our newest member to you all soon!!

I am happy to report that Danielle is doing great! She still cries for her mom and grandmother at bed time and at naps, but she no longer is grieving all the time. We have given her pictures of her foster mom, and when she first saw it, she dropped her head back and screamed in pain. It was so hard to watch. Now when she is grieving, she goes and gets the pictures to show us. We all shed some tears together, and she moves on. I must say that watching a 15 month old grieve is the absolute hardest thing I have ever had to go through - and many of you know some of the hard things that I have had to go through. This is the worst. I am just grateful to God that he is healing her heart - please keep up the prayers. We had a great dinner last night at the White Swan Hotel (another big adoption hotel that is absolutely beautiful). One of the guys who plays softball with Steve has a brother (Richard) who just moved here to Guangzhou with his wife (Tisha) and 2 daughters. Tisha is working at the US Consulate - although not in the adoption department at this time. Anyway, we were able to meet up with them for a wonderful dinner. Their daughters are beautiful - ages 4 & 15 months, so Tao Tao wasn't the only one making a mess at the table. Oh!! She finally drank something! At dinner she drank a liquid yogurt that is very popular here. She also began to show us that she can eat! She loves fruit (especially mandarin oranges and dragon fruit)...in fact, she ate 4 oranges at lunch and 4 at dinner. She wanted more, but we couldn't in good conscience do it - we didn't want her tummy to get upset! She really is doing well. We are glad that she is eating, but now she is boycotting the bottle - go figure. I actually think that the bottle reminds her of her mother, but at least she is getting food now. She is a cutie - very busy and always exploring. For those of you who know our other 2 girls, you know that she will fit right in! Right now, Steve and Tao Tao are out on a tour of a flower pagoda, and I am alone in the hotel room. I went on a shopping expedition with a local - Ann (from redthreadchina.com). She was fabulous! I bought all of the souveniers that I needed/wanted and then some, for a fraction of the price that I can find around our hotel. It's almost embarrassing what I spent on some things! In fact, she just came back to my room with her friend who is a finger painting artist - wait until you see what this young man (age 22) can paint with his fingertips and nails! It is breathtaking! I bought a number of pictures from him for such a steal! But at least he gets all of the money instead of only 40% of the jacked up prices here on Shamian Island (where our hotel is). It is also cool that I was able to meet and talk to him - so now I can honestly say that I met the man who painted our pictures!! I am a little disappointed that I missed out on our tour, but I am so glad that I went shopping! Like I said, I bought all that I could possibly need and we will still be bringing money home. It was worth paying Ann $10 per hour for her help and bargaining skills - I couldn't have done it without her! I just wanted to let you all know that things are really going well now - and now that shopping is done, I am ready to go home. Only 2 more days before we fly home and I am more than ready! I am so grateful for all of your comments, prayers and support. Keep them up - we need them. I know that you all want pictures, and I am sorry that I haven't posted more. Computers here are ridiculously slow and I really haven't had the time to fiddle with it! I promise to post a ton when I get home. I was going to try to post some now, but Steve has the camera. Hold on - only a few more days and you will have pictures - I promise!! Love to you all!

Well, we made it to Guangzhou - the last leg of our journey, before returning home. We also have great news....yesterday (Friday) and today, Fu Tao woke up without crying! This was a first! She still cries for her mom before she goes to sleep, but she is definitely adjusting! On Friday was the best day we have had so far. She still prefers Daddy, but she is smiling and interacting more and more. Our flight left Nanning at 6:50 pm last night and it was full of adoptive families; however, our little one was the one that cried the most. She actually did really well considering that her naps had been messed up, and she was probably hungry from hunger strikes this week. Amy gave her a lollipop, and let me tell you, our little country girl knew how to work it! She tore it up - but she was a sticky mess (and so was Daddy). We arrived at the Victory Hotel late last night and had a bit of difficulty getting her to sleep, but once she was down, she stayed down. Finally, this morning our little girl ate a great breakfast! She still won't eat congee, but this was the first day that our Asian Princess ate rice - go figure! After breakfast, we went for her physical exam - that was not fun! The place was packed and it was her naptime! We actually went through the exams quite quickly and then it was back to the hotel for naps. While Daddy and Tao Tao napped, I worked on our paperwork for the US consulate...we are finally done with paperwork and fees! WHEW! We went to Lucy's for lunch (where Steve and I had cheeseburgers and Tao Tao tore up some noodles and ate 4 mandarin oranges!). Then we tracked down a stroller and bought her squeaky shoes! Right now she is squeaking all over our suite! Very cute! So all in all, things are getting better and better every day - thank you God! Oh, the clerk at one of the shops here told us that she was "spicy" - very accurate description. Although we are enjoying our time here, we are ready to come home. After I complete my shopping list, then I will be good to go! Our love to you all! Oh, and Stephanie and Liz are doing fantastic - all that worrying for nothing! Again - thank you God!!

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving! We sure miss the turkey and all of the fixin's...but to be honest, it doesn't even feel like Thanksgiving Day! Instead of the big family feast, we went to visit a buddist temple and a beautiful park. We climbed the 9 stories to the top of a pagoda to see a beautiful view. Daddy carried Fu Tao all the way up and all the way down, even though she is very good at steps! This little girl sure can move! She runs faster than any 15 month I have ever met, and she even alternates feet going up stairs (this info is important to the therapist in me). Oh, and she can even peel her own bananas! Okay, the bananas get a little mutilated, but she can open them quite easily. She hasn't eaten a whole lot for us - I guess that she is sort of on a hunger strike, but when she does eat it is usually fruit, noodles, cookies and crackers. She did eat some french fries at breakfast and some McDonald chicken nuggets for lunch. She is doing a little better today, but she still cries for her mom and grandma. It is heartbreaking. When we are in the hotel room, she grabs our finger and leads us to the door as if to tell us, "Take me home". Poor little one doesn't understand that she is home. She did wave to her big sisters today via Skype, and I know that they will help her to feel more at home. And no worries, little Tao Tao will definitely be able to hold her own! She is a little feisty one! We were able to develop some pictures that her foster family took for us, and there was one picture of her playing with chickens - no lie! She definitely lived in rugged conditions, but I bet she would give anything to go back. Please keep praying for her to love her new home and family. We know that she will, we just hope that it's sooner than later. We had to say good-bye to Meg yesterday...that was very hard. Even though I had never even met her before, I really connected with her. I was very sad to see her go - yet again, more tears shed! She will be coming to the States over Christmas, so hopefully we will see each other - hopefully with a more adapted Fu Tao! All in all, we are hanging in there. We desperately miss our girls, family and friends and can't wait to come home, but we are enjoying China. Thank you to everyone who posts messages to us....we long for more (oh, Camille - I could not find a single can of Pringles in Laibin!). We love you all and hope that you eat some turkey for us! I will try and post more pictures - I know you all want them, but honestly, our focus has been on Fu Tao - we are doing everything we can to help her during her grieving process - we welcome any suggestions!!

Officially ours!

Well, it is official...Lai Fu Tao is officially our daughter! We went to the civil affairs office this morning to pay our fees and put our thumbprints where they needed to go, and that was that! That was the highlight of our day. We found out that we will not be able to tour the orphanage or meet the foster family. That was a disappointment, but we do understand and do not want to cause trouble. Although we feel that it would mean so much to Danielle for us to meet them, we are going to be able to contact the family through the orphanage, and I am glad for that. If we return to China when Danielle gets older, then we can meet the foster family...and we will. We have every intention of bringing her back one day so that she can visit her birthplace. Now for the hardest news...Danielle is grieving very hard. She is so sad and misses her Mama and Nana (grandmother). She cries for them at sleep time, and sometimes during the day, but bed time is the worst. She just fell asleep after crying for 45 minutes. Her little heart is breaking. It is so hard to watch. We try to remind ourselves that this is actually a good thing - she needs to grieve. It also means that she was so loved by her family and she loves them...hopefully she will be able to love us soon too. She hates being inside - especially in our room. She cries almost non-stop when she is in here, so we try and get out as much as possible. She is attaching more to Steve at this point, but does want me to carry her sometimes, and will go outside with me alone. If we are in the room she prefers Steve, but will go back and forth, as if she doesn't know who to turn to. She is so missing her family. It is hard to watch other families with children who are not having as hard of a time. I know the facts and the reasons, but it is still heartbreaking. I keep telling myself that it will get better, but it still doesn't help sometimes. We did get some photos of her first year of life, and Meg just took 2 disposable cameras full of pictures to get developed, so hopefully we will see what is on them soon. Meg has been a God-send. She is such a big help! She ran out and got baby shoes for us last night, as Fu Tao came to us barefoot! The one thing that I didn't pack! Steve and I are both sad that Meg will be leaving on Wed - we will definitely miss her. I have so enjoyed getting to know her - we actually are a lot a like, and I can honestly say that I love her dearly! Okay, I will end on a positive note - Danielle finally ate real food! She has been surviving on bottles and Cheerios, but at lunch today, she ate noodles...from a chopstick! How cute! She really ate a good amount for such a little one! She is tiny - wearing 9 month clothes perfectly. May be getting ready for 12 months soon. Anyway, I just wanted to give you a brief update. Please pray for all of us...Steve and I are so sad for her - it is the absolute hardest thing that we have had to go through. Please pray that God heals her heart - He is the only one that can!

WE HAVE HER!

Well, after a Monday morning of going to Walmart to buy diapers and snacks, it was finally time to go and get our little Ah Tao (foster family nickname). We boarded a bus with the Pinson family, Michael our guide and Meg to take about a 10 minute ride to the Lottery Hotel where we would at last get our little one. When we got there, they took us up to the 4th floor where there were a number of "waiting rooms" with couches and toys. We could hear children crying and we all wondered if they were ours! Michael told us that we would probably have to wait for about 10-15 minutes before our girls would come in, but after I snapped 3 pictures, I heard Michael announce SuSu's name! Tears came to my eyes as I saw the Pinson family finally united! And then, "Lai Fu Tao"! I cannot tell you the emotions that I felt! She was crying, but did come to me. Cheerios definitely helped. You could tell how scared and sad she was. We then went outside for a bit in order to get away from all of the commotion of more families being united - what an amazing experience! We went back to the hotel and did some paperwork - Fu Tao fell asleep leaning against me. When she woke up, we took her outside to get some air and food. She loves being outside! Whenever we are inside...she tries to lead us out again. She is definitely going to fit right in with her big sisters! She really was a different girl outside...she was pointing and babbling - we even got some smiles and giggles. I had been kissing her cheek, and one time she spontaneously leaned over and kissed my cheek! All of her reports say that she loves music, noisy toys, to be outside and to laugh - she is very social! We haven't seen a lot of that yet, but I have no doubt that we will. She actually began to prefer Daddy last night! She comes to both of us, but Daddy took her out for a walk, so now she wants him. In fact, last night she fell sleep on his chest and he was freaking out a little! He loved that she wanted him, but really couldn't stand the thought of not being able to move freely! We scooted her over, and all was well. At this moment, BaBa (daddy) and his little one are sleeping soundly. I just wanted to take a moment to let you all know that we have our little one and that we are working on bonding. Please keep us in your prayers - we know that you are, we definitely feel them! Thank you and our love to you all!

Check out our "In China" Slide Show!!

Yesterday (Sunday in China) was our last day in Laibin. After breakfast, we strolled the streets for a while before our driver came to pick us up. While walking around, we came across a middle school and an elementary school. They are definitely different than the schools I am used to seeing! They were at least gated, but they were located right in the center of the block with shops all around. We did not go into the complex, because we didn't feel that would be appropriate, but we did take pictures!! We left Laibin a little sad, but completely grateful to have had the experience. I can tell you that visiting Laibin was the best thing that we could have done. We are looking forward to sharing our adventures with Danielle - it is going to be so incredible to tell her how much we loved her birthplace - I hope that she will enjoy hearing about it. Anyway, our driver picked us up as scheduled and drove us all the way to the Majestic Hotel. We were suppose to stay at the Wharton, but we found out right before we left Guangzhou, that the government needed the hotel for something and we got bumped - everyone got bumped! But all is well, the Majestic is absolutely beautiful. When we arrived at the hotel we found out Aisha Cooper, who works with us at Hope For Children in Atlanta, was already checked in. So we stormed Aisha's room, having Meg yell stuff in Chinese. I think Aisha was too scared to open the door! We met up with Michael, our guide while we are in Nanning, and the Pinson family to head out for dinner. Once again, we were fed like kings! I have been loving the food...although I will be ready for a nice juicy steak when I get home! After dinner, Steve, Aisha and I went for a massage! Oh yeah!!! It was a fantastic hour long massage for $12!! They found knots on me that I didn't even know I had, but boy do I feel good now! We will be meeting Danielle today at 3:30 pm (2:30 am your time) today! I just can't even believe it! We are going to run out to get some clothes laundered and to get diapers and snacks, but other than that, our main focus will be on our little princess. Please pray all goes well & pray God wraps His arms around her in order to make her feel safe in such a scary situation. We have no doubt in our mind that God has orchestrated the entire process and that He destined Danielle to be our daughter since the beginning of time, but we still want Danielle to feel as safe and secure as possible. Please continue to pray that we can go back to Laibin to tour the orphanage and especially to meet the foster mother. God can do anything - we just pray He wants us to meet the foster family as much as we do!! Thank you all for your posted reply comments (they're very encouraging), love, support and especially your prayers - we couldn't have done this without them!!
P.S. We are having some difficulty downloading pictures, basically because it is taking a ridiculous amount of time. We are having to jump through a lot of hoops to even access our blog! I have sent some pictures of Laibin to a friend, and hopefully he will be able to post them sometime on Mon (your time). When we get back to the States, I will post even more!

Saturday in Laibin

What an absolutely INCREDIBLE day we had exploring Laibin! Having Meg as our "tour guide" gave us the best experience ever - to interact with the Laibin people and to experience the "real" Laibin. We started out our day with a delicious authentic Chinese breakfast in the Laibin International Hotel (remember, no Western influence here at all!) and then we were able to talk to Steffi and Liz via webcam. It was so good to see them! They keep asking where Danielle is - it will be fun to be actually able to have them all meet! Our first stop of the day was to finding Danielle's finding spot. When Danielle was abandoned, she was left on a bridge head - and it turns out that the bridge was only about 3 blocks away from our hotel. When we found it, we were so grateful to see that it was heavily travelled. There was a city park on one corner, stores on 2 corners, and a corner with well-maintained "rest area" with a lot of ricksaw taxis parked nearby and lots of people! We don't yet know the exact spot, but maybe when we come back to Laibin later in the week, we will be able to get that information. It was a very emotional moment, where all of us shed some tears. I can't help but think about Danielle's mother...all of the emotions that she had to be feeling then and even now, wondering whatever happened to her daughter. Every time that we have crossed that bridge, I wonder about that day and I wonder if she does too? Does she work in one of those shops? Does she have to cross that bridge & pass that spot every day going to/coming from work? We will never know. I also can't help but wonder if Danielle was abandoned mainly because of the cyst on her neck. She was about 1 month old when she was found, and maybe her family knew they would not be able to pay for her medical expenses and wanted to give her a chance. There is not health insurance here...if you have a permit to live in the city, the city will pay a fraction of the cost (about 10%?), but getting treated for a simple thing like a common cold could easily cost $100 (which is a lot of money in China). If you have moved into the city illegally from the country you cannot even go for medical help because 1) you probably couldn't afford it, and 2) you run the risk of being shipped out of the city. We have been learning a lot about the socioeconomics of the Chinese people, and we can't help to wonder if this played a huge part in Danielle's abandonment. We then strolled through the city park and were followed by 3 little girls...who giggled all the way. We were able to take a lot of pictures of people in the park (with their permission) and we were the object of photo taking ourselves. We were kind of like celebrities to them! The school-age kids would say hello, and laughed at us when we would say "ni hao" (mandarin for "hello"). Many were curious to see the "foreigners" and they were even more amazed when Meg started talking to them in "excellent chinese". We think an older man, the curator of the park, may have called the police out of concern for the "foreigners" taking video, photos & causing such a stir with the people. When Meg noticed the police showed up, she told us it was time to keep moving. Steve really enjoys talking (with Meg's help) to anyone showing interest, and it was unfortunate we had to go. We caught a cab to the train station in order to plan a way back to Nanning. We went through a very poor area of the city. The train station itself was full of poor and homeless people. We even saw a man openly shooting up with heroin right in front of the bus station. Well, the train didn't pan out - only hard seats available, and Meg told us that is something we did not want to experience. Our next idea was to hire a driver, so outside we went to the rows of taxis. Once outside, people started walking toward us - very curious about us, I guess. But when Meg said, "Let's get out of here" - we did. We hopped in the first cab and we were gone! The driver drove us to the orphanage, where we were able to take a few pictures of the outside of it and the store fronts around it. It was a very non-descript building - it just looked like a regular store front. We couldn't help but wonder if our daughter was actually inside. Our driver then suggested taking us to a brand new "scenic area / tourist attraction" about 30 minutes outside of the city, and we jumped at the chance! We drove past beautiful condos in a gated community - all for government officials only - and through a few small farming villages. Quite a comparison! The countryside was beautiful (except for the haze of pollution) and very poor. It was like we were watching a PBS special - water buffalo pulling carts, people washing their clothes in the river, run-down houses, people cooking outside...was Danielle from this part of China? We will never know. We got to the park, which turned out to be a kind of outdoor musuem dedicated to Pangu. The ancestors of the people here are credited with the origin of this mythology regarding the creation of humanity. They believe in a mythical story about 2 twins (a boy and girl), who were sent down from heaven with the purpose to procreate and therefore, started the human race - like a Chinese Adam and Eve. Meg had a little bit of difficulty understanding the story, so we are going to check it out some more later. It turns out, we were the very first foreigners to visit, which was a big deal, evidenced by the following we had. The tour guide was ecstatic to be able to share with us this rich history. We took a boat ride and toured the grounds. One girl, Qin Yu Wang (a junior in high school) followed us around and liked to practice her English with us. Everyone was so nice and wonderful - we had an amazing time. On our way back into the city, we decided to stop at the city square. It was quite pretty and bustling with people. Again, 3 little girls followed us around - they asked us where we were from and after we told them "America", they said, "Oh, we are from China." How cute is that?! We grabbed another cab back to our hotel, and went to a tea house right in between our hotel and "Danielle's bridge". We spent a couple of hours tasting different teas and talking with the shop owner & his employees. It was a great experience! Steve and I bought a tea set and some tea - very yummy tea, I might add! After a little down time, we then went out for dinner at the Laibin Grand Hotel - and it was, again, very tasty! I am actually enjoying the food more than I thought I would - at least most of it! We then ventured through a night market right across from our hotel. We bought some dried fruits, candy and jewelry...we even got to see (get this Bumpa) a kung fu presentation by a group of Shaolin priests (just like Grasshopper)! At one point (while we were talking to the monks), I realized that we were totally surrounded by at least 50 curious Chinese people (mostly men). This was a little unnerving, especially since I was wearing our money belt (no safe in our hotel room). But they were all very friendly and just wanted to get a glimpse of the foreigners. Many people (most) have never actually seen or met any Americans...Laibin is just not the main place tourists visit. The city only has a population of about 40,000, but we loved it! As you can see, we had a very busy but gratifying day. I am so glad that we decided to come and explore Laibin. We are so thankful that we have had the experience that we did - to experience the real Laibin. Meg and the talents God has given her are a gift from Him. We are so grateful to God for how He put this trip together for us. It was great to experience Danielle's birthplace the ways we did. Steve would prefer to stay here the whole time. If we had a guide from the city, we would not have seen and felt all that we did!! Thank you God for giving this to us and to Danielle - it will be so amazing to be able to share this day with her when she gets older. (We promise to post pictures soon - experiencing technical difficulties)

Made it to Laibin!

After an okay nights sleep at the Victory in Guangzhou, we ate a fantastic breakfast and met the Millers...another Hope For Children family (we will be able to spend more time with them when we return to Guangzhou on Friday). The Millers had their new little girl, Sarah Beth, with them already and she sure is a cutie! Her older brother (Noah) and sister (Abby) were all about holding her! Sarah Beth was enjoying all of the attention! At 5:15 am, my friend Donna knocked on our hotel room door to introduce us to her daughter, Shelby. Donna and her family were all packed up and ready to leave China for their return home! Shelby was a little doll - our prayers go with them for a safe trip home! After breakfast we were able to have a video conference with our little ones back home (we used Skype and it worked wonderfully - just a little advice for any of you planning a trip over here - and computer to computer is free!!). Anyway, we enjoyed talking to Stephanie and Liz - they seemed to be doing fine - Stephanie is the one who cried, and Liz just kept dancing for us! Go figure! I was more worried about Liz (2)!! We were so grateful to receive a comment from Ms. Frankie, the girls' preschool director, telling us that they did great in school. Thank you Ms. Frankie - you are the best!!
Okay....on to travel tidbits. We ate our first McDonalds at the Guangzhou airport before we left for Nanning - it was very good, the real thing! After an hour flight on a Chinese airline (included drinks and a heavy snack...NWA didn't even give us peanuts on the way from ATL to Detroit...if you wanted a snack you had to pay for it!)....we arrived in Nanning, where I had my first encounter with a squatty potty and I am very proud to say, without incident! Well, now we had to figure a way to get to Laibin..by train, bus or car? We first tried to rent a car/driver - too expensive at the airport. We then decided to go by train (since a car/driver was too expensive). So we grabbed a cab and CRAMMED all of our stuff into it...barely. All the cab drivers were making fun of us for being so packed into this little car. Steve asked the driver & he responded he had never carried a larger load of people/stuff. On the way to the train station, Meg, Steve's sister and our guide at this point, talked our driver into calling one of his friends to drive us to Laibin in their own car (2.5 hours), and thank you, God, it happened!! We got here (Laibin) at about 7 pm, checked into the Laibin International Hotel, and then ventured out to find dinner. Meg took us to a restaurant and ordered for us a huge traditional dinner. And you know what...it was excellent!! We had so much food and it was all so flavorful and delicious!! We had duck soup, whole boiled chicken (served in a bucket with the boiled, bald head staring at us), a thin, flaky type bread, cabbage, spinach, rice & a root made into a special dessert (Steve described it as carmelized Dunkin Donuts Minchkins covered in honey - Meg gave Steve a hard time for saying Dunkin Donuts - living in China she misses certain things from home & didn't appreciate being re minded of them). After dinner, we came home and crashed - I slept from 9 pm - 5 am solid...Praise God!! Let me tell you though...we are in REAL DEEP REMOTE China. No western style anything, no McDonalds...nothing!! This is all China. We got a whole lot of stares walking down the street. Laibin is not a tourist attraction. People are not used to seeing foreigners. Meg says they think we're Russians. Oh, and yes, we had to cross a street a couple times. For those of you who have been to China you know what I am talking about! There are no cross walk signs here - you cross at your own risk! We weaved in and out of bikes, scooters and dodged cars...in the dark!! A little unnerving, and if I had to go by myself, I would probably still be standing on the corner. Now, it wasn't as bad as Nanning or Guangzhou, but running out into the middle of traffic goes against everything I had been taught!! And I am sure that we will have to do it again many times, unless we only go places on the same side of the street as the hotel! Today, we are going to explore Laibin, talk with the Laibin people who are willing (through Meg) and see Danielle's finding spot. I will definitely post again about everything that we see - and by then, I should have some great photos! Thank you for all of your prayers and support - all is going well so far and in about 48 hours, we will be getting ready to go and get our little princess!! We can't wait!! Our love to you all!!

WE ARE IN CHINA!

Well, after more than 24 hours of traveling, we finally made it to Guangzhou, China and the Victory Hotel! We had a great travel experience - all filights were on time, we found all of our gates (in fact the gate that we had to find in Detroit for our flight to Tokyo, was just across the hallway), NW served us good food, we met up with Joe, Amy, Josh, Ryan and Kris in Tokyo for the last leg of our trip, and we got all of our luggage. We are checked in, and getting cleaned up for hopefully a good nights sleep before we head to Laibin tomorrow afternoon. While I miss our little ones terribly, I am SO glad that we didn't bring them along.....what an exhausting day!! All of our flights had crying infants and children, and I am so grateful that they weren't ours! I am praying that God will help Danielle to handle such a grueling trip! I am also praying that I will be able to stay awake on the way home to take care of her. I was able to sleep A LOT, and Steve slept very little. Despite all the sleep, I am still exhausted! I just wanted to give you a quick update before I go to bed. Keep sending us comments - we so enjoy reading them. And Nana, please give Steffi and Liz huge hugs and kisses from us - tell them that Mommy and Daddy love them very much and that we miss them!!!

China here we come!!

Can you believe that it is finally time for us to go and get our little girl!! Steve and I leave at 9 am on Wed. morning!! We will arrive in Guangzhou, China at 10:40 pm on Thurs. I will re-post our itinerary, so that you will know where we are and when!! I promise to post as often as I can. I know that we will be busy, but we truly want to share this journey with all of you!! Please join in by posting your own comments! We would love to hear from all of you!! You do not have to have a blog to post! All you do is click "comments" and then click anonymous - you can type a comment and just sign your name. Please sign your name - we want to know who is leaving us messages! We will be able to read all comments even while we are in China. So please post away as it will be great to hear from you while we are away :) Here is our itinerary:

Nov 14 - leave for China
Nov 15 - arrive in Guangzhou, China
Nov 16 - fly to Nanning, take train to Laibin City, Guangxi Province
Nov 16-18 - spend the weekend exploring Laibin City - Danielle's birthplace
Nov 18 - take train back to Nanning, capital city of Guangxi Province
Nov 19 - go to Civil Affairs office and meet Danielle for the first time!!!!!!!
Nov 23 - fly back to Guangzhou
Nov 24 - Danielle's physical exam
Nov 26 - Consulate appointment
Nov 27 - oath ceremony
Nov 28 - return home - land at 5:32 pm!!!! Danielle will finally get to meet her 2 big sisters who are so excited to meet her!!

Check out my Slide Show!

One Week to Go!!!

Well...in one week will be on our way to China!! We have been busy getting ready and taking care of pre-schoolers!! I have bought everything that I need to take with us (except for snacks-which is on my "to do" list for tomorrow), and everything is already in a suitcase. All we have left to pack is our clothes! We are still debating on what clothes to take, but we do know that we will be packing light and doing laundry a few times!! Two of my good friends, Tracy and Cynthia, came over this week to help me organize our house - I am so grateful for their servants heart and their help! I couldn't have done it without them!! Steve heard from his step-sister today, and she let us know that she booked our hotel rooms in Laibin!! We will be staying at the Laibin International Hotel over the weekend of Nov 16-18 - it is one of the few hotels in Laibin designed for foreigners. We are so excited that we are going to be able to spend time exploring Danielle's birthplace - but not as excited as meeting our daughter! It is so amazing to think that next week at this time, we will be flying to Tokyo and then on to China!! Danielle will be in our arms in less than 2 weeks!!!
We received some great news today from our county's DFCS - we were approved to receive a $2000 grant for our adoption!! This will certainly help to cover some of the expenses - praise the Lord!! This specific grant is for children with special needs and it sure was a blessing to receive the phone call today. God certainly is helping with the hardest part - financial. God has really been helping, though, through this grant and donations from family - THANK YOU!!
Oh! I have to share this with you....Steve had to go out of town on business earlier this week, and he got home late Tuesday night. When Liz saw him, the first thing she said was, "You get Danielle?" We have been talking with her about Daddy and Mommy leaving to go and get Danielle, so she apparently thought that since Daddy was gone, he must have gone to get Danielle. How sweet is that!! Let's just hope that she is happy to see her sister when we really get home. We continue to pray that Steffi and Liz do well with our absence - everytime I think about leaving them for 2 weeks, I get so sad. I know that they will be in fantastic hands, but I am going to miss them like crazy!!!

Red Thread Quilt

Tonight my good friend, Celeste, took time out of her busy life to help me shop for some quilting materials to make a quilt for Danielle. Many people who adopt from China make what is called a 100 Good Wishes Quilt. To welcome and celebrate a new life, there is a tradition in the northern part of China to make a Bai Jia Bei, or "100 Good Wishes Quilt." It is a custom to invite 100 people to contribute a single square patch of cloth. The 100 patches are sewn together into a quilt that contains the luck, energy, and good wishes from all the families and friends who contributed a piece of fabric. The quilt is then passed down from generation to generation. I loved this idea, but decided to go a different route. I came up with the idea to make a Red Thread Quilt. Posted on the top of my blog is the explanation of a Red Thread Journey: 'Chinese folklore says there is an invisible red thread connecting those who are destined to meet, regardless of time, place or circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle, but never break.' I thought that it would be really neat to make a quilt that Danielle could have and cherish, that had the names of all of the people that helped to bring her home. So...what I am going to do, is have everyone who played a part in this adoption (case workers, notaries, oprhanage directors, foster family members, etc - the list is endless), sign a piece of fabric. I am then going to embroider over their signature with red thread and piece the quilt together with some silk fabric that I am planning on buying in China. Tonight I purchased the "signature" fabric and some accessories. I am very excited about this and I hope that it turns out like I am envisioning it to be. I really hope that in the future, it will really be meaningful to Danielle. I am hoping that she will be amazed at how so many people came together for a common goal - to bring Danielle home to the family that God destined her to be a part of forever!!

Safe travels and shopping

Our friends, Donna and CJ made it to Beijing today! They will be spending the weekend in Beijing, and then flying to Nanning on Sunday to get their daughter Shelby on Monday! How exciting! Shelby is from the same province as Danielle, so Donna and CJ's trip will mirror ours exactly. We will be diligently following their blog so that we can learn what we need to do/not do for our trip and so that we can watch their journey unfold.


I am grateful to have been able to cross one more thing off of my huge "to do" list today. Amy and I went shopping in order to buy "gifts" for the orphanage director, nannies, notaries, and other people that we will run into while completing adoption paperwork. It was a huge relief to complete this task - I surely didn't want to buy anything cheesy but didn't want to spend a ton of money! One thing I didn't realize was how many things are made in China!!! The biggest challenge of the day was to find items that were NOT made in China - try it next time you go shopping!!! The only "gift" that I have left to buy is one for the foster family. What do you buy for people who have taken such great care of your daughter for the first year of her life?! We are also praying that God allows us to meet them - if it will be beneficial for Danielle when she gets older.


Last night we took Stephanie and Elizabeth trick-or-treating...well actually, we took them trunk-or-treating at a church down the road. It was great - people decorate their cars and pass out candy to lots of little kids! They even had a festival in the gym with lots of games, crafts and moon walks. The girls had a great time and we all enjoyed the candy!! Although, this morning, Stephanie asked if we could go "real trick or treating"...she said that she wanted to go to people's houses instead of the church party. So much for being grateful!! We are all looking forward to next Halloween, when Danielle will be with us!!
Sleeping Beauty and Word Girl

More Preparations

Time continues to dwindle - we leave in exactly 2 weeks!!! We have been busy shopping, planning, organizing - trying to get ready for our trip and trying to get our home ready for our new daughter. Part of this included helping to throw a shower for our friends Joe and Amy over the weekend. We had a wonderful time celebrating SuSu (see picture)! We have such also been getting great travel tips and advice from wonderful friends: Ellen, Lucy, Donna, Teilynn, Denise, Kelly, and Jill. All seems to be falling into place, it's amazing to think that in 3 weeks we will have Danielle - how incredible! God has been so good to us during this journey and we can't wait to see how Danielle transitions into her forever family. We are so blessed that God has allowed us to give this little girl a home and a family who will love her forever! However, we know that Danielle may not react the same way, at least initially. She has been living with a foster family since she was about 2 months old, and from what we have seen in pictures, Danielle is dearly loved. While we are overjoyed at finally getting our daughter, she may not be - we pray that God will help her to adjust to us quickly. I have added another excerpt from A4everfamily.org:

For the last six months or more, the expectant parents have been busy. They've painted a room, bought little tee shirts, shoes, and diapers and gone over the baby name book at least a hundred times. Daily, if not hourly, their thoughts turn to the baby waiting for them, thousands of miles away. They take out the precious photo and examine it again and again, wondering "How much older will he look?" The hearts and minds of these loving parents are never too far from this baby. For the baby, however, these folks haven't even been a fleeting thought. Somewhere, often in a far away country, the baby has already experienced immense loss. For nine months, he lived and breathed with his mother. He learned to know her voice, her smell, her moods-both good and bad-and her sleep. At birth, he abruptly lost everything he had grown to love. He may show signs of grieving at the time, or he may store the loss deep in his brain and body, at a visceral level that will become more obvious with time. At the time of birth, a child perceives himself as being one and the same as his birth mother. He does not recognize that they are two separate individuals. Physically, his respiration and heart rate regulates in sync with hers. Emotionally, he sees the world through her eyes. Her anxiety is his. Her joy and contentment are his. So what happens when a part of him, the part that regulates not only the physical, but also the emotional, disappears? Perhaps he is placed in a foster home at birth. He spends his days getting to know the smells, voice, tastes, and moods of his new caretaker. Although it is hard to trust, having already lost a mommy, he enjoys the soft touches and the warm feeling he gets when she fills his tummy. He feels confused and worried, not knowing who this person is and what happened to his first love. If he spends time in a hospital or orphanage, his little body grows increasingly anxious. After all, he can only focus about nine inches from his face, and the images that move in and out of that space are constantly changing. In both cases, the sheer separation from the birth mother can put his body on high alert. The primitive part of his brain, the "fight or flight" center, works overtime, flooding with cortisol, sending the body messages akin to that of an adult who senses his life is in danger. "Will I get food?" "Who will comfort me?" "Will I survive?" A variety of factors-genetic predisposition, prenatal environment, ongoing transitions, early environment-contribute to the level at which the child is affected. The initial abandonment alone affects his brain and body, with hospitalization, foster homes, orphanages, multiple placements, and pain increasing the potential for long-term attachment issues. And then, without warning, it happens again. Just as he is getting accustomed to the new caretakers in his life, he is suddenly handed to a stranger. This person's hair, skin, smell, and voice are all wrong. The stranger takes him to a place filled with people. They go and go and go for what seems like an eternity. Eventually, the child is handed to more strangers. Bright lights flash everywhere. Nothing smells right. Nothing sounds right. Nothing looks right. The adults are in love. The baby is in shock.

Preparing for Danielle

I am sorry that I haven't posted anything new in a few days, but things have been crazy!! Getting shots, ordering money (China wants crisp US money), making lists, writing down schedules for grandparents, shopping for travel essentials, and taking care of little ones - all things that take up so much time! Another important thing that we have been doing is getting ready to help Danielle transition into our family. We have been trying to prepare Steffi and Liz for Danielle's arrival. Liz often says that she misses Danielle and wants her to come home. In fact every time that we pray (even at meals), this precious 2 yr old reminds us to pray for Danielle. Stephanie (4) makes up words and says that she is speaking Chinese. In fact, she came up with some Chinese nicknames for her and Liz: NiNi and NuNu. They are very excited about their new little sister. We have been trying to explain to them that Mommy and Daddy will be sleeping in China for many nights, but that Nana, Momma and Bumpa will be with them. We are going to take along our laptop that has a webcam, and hopefully that will help all of us - being able to see each other! I sure am going to hate leaving them!! We also have been reading about attachment issues with adopted children and talking with adoptive parents. Our hearts break thinking that Danielle has had to and will have to deal with grief at such a young age. The illustration in the previous post, truly brings me to tears, thinking that Danielle at 15 months old has already experienced tremendous loss. We pray daily for her and that we will be able to provide a secure environment where she can express herself. Please help us and pray for that as well. Please pray for Steffi and Liz to do well while we are gone, please pray for our parents to have an easy time with our girls, please pray that we will have safe and healthy travels, please pray that Danielle grieves and then bonds quickly with us as her forever family, please pray for her foster family and their loss, please pray for her birth parents for their loss.

Immense Loss: Walk a Mile in Baby's Booties

Okay....here it is.....I found this illustration at http://www.a4everfamily.org/ about what adopted babies might be feeling - just presented in terms of what we can relate to. I will let it speak for itself.......

Imagine for a moment… You have met the person you've dreamed about all your life. He has every quality that you desire in a spouse. You plan for the wedding, enjoying every free moment with your fiancée. You love his touch, his smell, the way he looks into your eyes. For the first time in your life, you understand what is meant by "soul mate," for this person understands you in a way that no one else does. Your heart beats in rhythm with his. Your emotions are intimately tied to his every joy, his every sorrow. The wedding comes. It is a happy celebration, but the best part is that you are finally the wife of this wonderful man. You fall asleep that night, exhausted from the day's events, but relaxed and joyful in the knowledge that you are next to the person who loves you more than anyone in the world…the person who will be with you for the rest of your life. The next morning you wake up, nestled in your partner's arms. You open your eyes and immediately look for his face. But IT'S NOT HIM! You are in the arms of another man. You recoil in horror. Who is this man? Where is your beloved? You ask questions of the new man, but it quickly becomes apparent that he doesn't understand you. You search every room in the house, calling and calling for your husband. The new guy follows you around, trying to hug you, pat you on the back,...even trying to stroke your arm, acting like everything is okay. But you know that nothing is okay. Your beloved is gone. Where is he? Will he return? When? What has happened to him? Weeks pass. You cry and cry over the loss of your beloved. Sometimes you ache silently, in shock over what has happened. The new guy tries to comfort you. You appreciate his attempts, but he doesn't speak your language-either verbally or emotionally. He doesn't seem to realize the terrible thing that has happened...that your sweetheart is gone. You find it difficult to sleep. The new guy tries to comfort you at bedtime with soft words and gentle touches, but you avoid him, preferring to sleep alone, away from him and any intimate words or contact. Months later, you still ache for your beloved, but gradually you are learning to trust this new guy. He's finally learned that you like your coffee black, not doctored up with cream and sugar. Although you still don't understand his bedtime songs, you like the lilt of his voice and take some comfort in it. More time passes. One morning, you wake up to find a full suitcase sitting next to the front door. You try to ask him about it, but he just takes you by the hand and leads you to the car. You drive and drive and drive. Nothing is familiar. Where are you? Where is he taking you? You pull up to a large building. He leads you to an elevator and up to a room filled with people. Many are crying. Some are ecstatic with joy. You are confused. And worried. The man leads you over to the corner. Another man opens his arms and sweeps you up in an embrace. He rubs your back and kisses your cheeks, obviously thrilled to see you. You are anything but thrilled to see him. Who in the world is he? Where is your beloved? You reach for the man who brought you, but he just smiles (although he seems to be tearing up, which concerns you), pats you on the back, and puts your hand in the hands of the new guy. The new guy picks up your suitcase and leads you to the door. The familiar face starts openly crying, waving and waving as the elevator doors close on you and the new guy. The new guy drives you to an airport and you follow him, not knowing what else to do. Sometimes you cry, but then the new guy tries to make you smile, so you grin back, wanting to "get along." You board a plane. The flight is long. You sleep a lot, wanting to mentally escape from the situation. Hours later, the plane touches down. The new guy is very excited and leads you into the airport where dozens of people are there to greet you. Light bulbs flash as your photo is taken again and again. The new guy takes you to another guy who hugs you. Who is this one? You smile at him. Then you are taken to another man who pats your back and kisses your cheek. Then yet another fellow gives you a big hug and messes your hair. Finally, someone (which guy is this?) pulls you into his arms with the biggest hug you've ever had. He kisses you all over your cheeks and croons to you in some language you've never heard before. He leads you to a car and drives you to another location. Everything here looks different. The climate is not what you're used to. The smells are strange. Nothing tastes familiar, except for the black coffee. You wonder if someone told him that you like your coffee black. You find it nearly impossible to sleep. Sometimes you lie in bed for hours, staring into the blackness, furious with your husband for leaving you, yet aching from the loss. The new guy checks on you. He seems concerned and tries to comfort you with soft words and a mug of warm milk. You turn away, pretending to go to asleep. People come to the house. You can feel the anxiety start to bubble over as you look into the faces of all the new people. You tightly grasp the new guy's hand. He pulls you closer. People smile and nudge one other, marveling at how quickly you've fallen in love. Strangers reach for you, wanting to be a part of the happiness. Each time a man hugs you, you wonder if he will be the one to take you away. Just in case, you keep your suitcase packed and ready. Although the man at this house is nice and you're hanging on for dear life, you've learned from experience that men come and go, so you just wait in expectation for the next one to come along. Each morning, the new guy hands you a cup of coffee and looks at you expectantly. A couple of times the pain and anger for your husband is so great that you lash out, sending hot coffee across the room, causing the new guy to yelp in pain. He just looks at you, bewildered. But most of the time you calmly take the cup. You give him a smile. And wait. And wait. And wait. --Written by Cynthia Hockman-Chupp, analogy courtesy of Dr. Kali Miller

This is what it is all about...

As I mentioned in earlier posts, we were blessed to find Danielle on Hope for Children's Waiting Child list. This list contained pictures and brief medical descriptions of 10 beautiful children. Danielle was #6 on that list. Joe and Amy's daughter, SuSu was #5. These are 3 more children that were on that list and now have a forever family: Ally (with her sisters), Frannie and Shelby. Shelby's mom and dad are getting ready to go and get her - they are leaving on the Oct. 31st! Ally was brought home in July, and Frannie came home in early September. Danielle, SuSu and Shelby are all from the same province - and they will get to be friends once they all get home!! It is truly amazing that we can be friends with half of the children on that list. Ally and Frannie's story is very amazing as well! They were both in the same orphanage in China! Before their parents were able to bring them home, they were friends! And now they only live about 30 minutes away from each other!! When they were in China, Frannie was called Emma by her caregivers, and little Ally still calls her that! We spent the afternoon with Ally, Frannie and Shelby's parents on Sunday and it was so wonderful to see how well these little girls are doing. They have gone through such dramatic changes in a few short months and yet they are dealing with it so well. God has given them such loving families - these little girls are truly blessed! Our prayers are now with Shelby, SuSu and Danielle, that they will transition easily into their forever families and that Frannie and Ally continue to blossom!!!

Family and Friends

Many of you may want to know what we are going to do with our other daughters (Stephanie, 4 and Elizabeth, 2) while we are in China. Well...we are leaving them at home. Initially, we went back and forth about taking them with us, but then we realized that would be insane!!! Can you imagine taking them on such a long flight! Not to mention getting them to eat meals without battles - in a restaurant 3 meals/day for 2 weeks!! So, we decided to leave them here. However, we are very blessed, because we have incredible caretakers to stay with them. For the first week, Steve's mom (Nana) will be staying with them, and the second week, my parents (Momma and Bumpa) will come down. We are so grateful to them for being so willing and eager to take time off from their jobs to take care of their grandchildren. I will admit, I am very sad about having to leave my girls, but I also think that it is very important that both Steve and I travel to China. So, since I have to leave my girls, I could not think of anyone else I would rather leave them with!! Okay, I am aware that I may have to de-program my girls from spoiling grandparents - but I am good with that. I just want my girls to feel totally loved and safe, and I know that they will be well taken care of! When Nana is here, 2 dear friends have offered to help in way that they can -- Cynthia and Robin. They have offered to have Nana and the girls over for playdates, meet at the park, or they could even bring their children over to our house so that they can play outside on the swingset. All of these distractions will hopefully help Steffi and Liz to miss us less!? When my parents come, they will be bringing my niece, Mikael (12) and I am sure that she will help to keep the girls occupied. Please remember to pray for Steffi and Liz while we are gone - they are very excited to get their new sister, but have never been away from us for an extended time, and they could have a tough time. Thank you!

More miracles!

Steve and I have been married 5 1/2 years and were introduced to each other by some very dear friends, Joe and Amy. I met Amy in Oct 1995 at church (after I had moved here from MN). She spend time studying the Bible with me and helped me to develop a wonderful relationship with God. In Nov of 1995, Amy and another dear friend, Paulette, baptized me!! What a wonderful day that was!! Four years later, Amy's husband Joe, met Steve (he was and still is one of Steve's customers), studied the Bible with him and baptized him!! After Steve's baptism, Amy and Joe introduced me to Steve. Steve then asked me out on a date, in which we went sailing with Joe and Amy. It was love at first sail!! About 2 years later, Steve and I became engaged, and we were married in Feb. 2002 - with Joe and Amy as our best man and matron of honor. I tell you this so that you see how dear these friends are to us - through this amazing couple, God put Steve and I together. Well, when Steve and I finally decided to start the adoption process last December, we found out that Joe and Amy had already started the process. We had no idea that they were going to do this!! At that time, we thought that it would be amazing to be able to travel to China with them. The chances were slim, since they were further along in the process, but with God, anything is possible! Well, it turns out that God truly does answer prayers - even better than we could ever imagine! It turns out that we will indeed be traveling together!!! Joe and Amy found their daughter on the same Waiting Child list where we found Danielle - and here is the kicker - both of our daughters are from the same province!!! We will leave for China on the same day, and spend 2 weeks together as we both expand our families! It will be so wonderful to be able to have such wonderful friends with us - and to share this experience together! God is good!

A Huge Kiss From God!

When we began to plan for our trip to China, we were originally going to spend the weekend in Beijing before receiving our daughter. I thought, how can you go to China and NOT see the Great Wall?! Well, plans changed, and we are not going to see the Wall. Instead, we decided that we would try to go spend some time exploring Danielle's birthplace. This did pose a slight problem - we would need to find a guide who would be willing to go with us. We weren't too worried about finding a guide for a day trip, but we really wanted to spend a few days there so that we could truly experience Laibin City. Well God is good!! We found out Sunday morning that Steve's step-sister would be able to go with us!! Meg is living in Harbin, China and is fluent in Mandarin! She has a PhD in political science at Harvard, and her dissertation is on urban reform and municipal politics. She is in China this year conducting three case studies of three cities in the Northeast, the former industrial area of China that has had a more difficult time during the reform period (since 1978). In more simple terms she studies social science or sociology to general people in China. Meg is an expert at going into unfamiliar cities and learning everything that there is to know about that city in a very short time!! Who could be a better guide?! An expert AND family! She has already helped us out a ton by translating a letter for Danielle's foster family! Currently, Meg is researching what hotels we can stay at, what sights we need to see, etc. We are so excited to be able to spend time in Laibin - we are planning on taking lots and lots of pictures and videos to share with Danielle (as well as buy local arts and crafts). We are very grateful that Meg is so eager to go with us and we are grateful for all of her help. She will also get to spend a couple of days with us after we receive Danielle. So as you can see, we could not have planned this any better ourselves - only God could have orchestrated such a perfect scenario!! Thank you, God!!

Our Travel Plans

After months of waiting, we have finally been able to book flights and arrange hotel rooms for our trip to China! Here is our current itinerary:

Nov 14 - leave for China
Nov 15 - arrive in Guangzhou, China
Nov 16 - fly to Nanning, take train to Laibin City, Guangxi Province
Nov 16-18 - spend the weekend exploring Laibin City - Danielle's birthplace
Nov 18 - take train back to Nanning, capital city of Guangxi Province
Nov 19 - go to Civil Affairs office and meet Danielle for the first time!!!!!!!
Nov 23 - fly back to Guangzhou
Nov 24 - Danielle's physical exam
Nov 26 - Consulate appointment
Nov 27 - oath ceremony
Nov 28 - return home - land at 5:32 pm!!!! Danielle will finally get to meet her 2 big sisters who are so excited to meet her!!

About Lai Fu Tao

Our precious little girl is from Laibin City, Guangxi Province,China. She was found at a bridge when she was about a month old.She was found with only the clothes on her back - no note, no name, nothing!! Her birth date was estimated to be August 18, 2006. She was initially placed at the orphanage in her town, but was placed in foster care within a few months. She has been in foster care ever since.When Fu Tao (Fu means 'lucky or blessed' and Tao means 'peach' - very appropriate for a GA girl!) was found, she had a lump on the side of her neck. The doctors diagnosed it as a lymph cystic hygroma. Basically, this means that a portion of her lymphatic system didn't close properly in utero, and created a balloon of lymph fluid above her shoulder. From what doctor's have told me and what I have researched about it, this in itself is not a life-threatening condition. In fact, it is quite correctable. At the time we received her medical records (May 1), no surgery had been performed. Since the lump itself was not painful, they weren't going to repairi t - unless it got bigger...which it did. From what I have learned, the only way that Fu Tao's condition could be dangerous would be if it enlarged to the point where it constricted her airway. We did find out that her lump had grown to the point where they needed to perform the surgery. Fu Tao, by all acounts, did very well during the surgery. We even received photos of her before and after her surgery and she was in great spirits!! She sounds like a real trooper! In the pictures pre and post surgery, she was 8 months old and she was already standing! From what information we have received, it seems that she is meeting all of her developmental milestones dead on!! Needless to say, we can't wait to finally meet her and bring her home!!! We will be giving her the name Danielle LaiAnne (Lai is her surname - probably given to her because of the city she was found in: Laibin City).

How God gave us our beautiful girl!

When we first started this adoption journey, we wanted to bring our daughter home as soon as possible. The idea of waiting over 2 years to adopt was hard to accept. So throughout the entire paper chase process we prayed that God would make it clear when and who needed to be a part of our family. We were very open to the idea of adopting a child with mild special needs. Due to the ages of our other children (3, 2), we really wouldn't be able to give a child who had significant needs the attention and care that they would need. Also, according to the new Chinese regulations, there had to be at least 12 months in between the ages of our youngest and our newest! That is very limiting. The way that China handles children with special needs, is they send adoption agencies a list of children who the agency tries to place with families that they are working with. Well, in December '06, China changed their regulations in regards to adoptive parents criteria (i.e. no longer could single people adopt), but they also decided to change their Waiting Child (children with special needs) procedures. The new way of doing things sounded very complicated and we weren't sure how well it was going to work. In Jan. '07, we found out that there was going to be one more list before the new system took affect! We prayed desperately that God would make things clear! We had to pray that there was a baby, at least 12 months younger than our youngest, and with very mild special needs. So we waited and prayed. In Jan, the list was suppose to come out at "any time". Well, it didn't. In fact, the long awaited list didn't come out until April 30! After months of waiting, God picked the perfect time to deliver! I had been talking to my friend Amy, who was also anxiously awaiting this list, and I had told her that I found out that our agency had the list, they were just waiting for the medical information to get translated. As soon as I hung up with her, I casually decided to check my email, and there it was! The announcement that the list had been posted! I immediately checked it out and there were 10 children on the list. I looked at all of the birthdates, and out of 10, only 1 of them met our age restrictions! I immediately called Steve (who was on his way home from softball) and told him about the list and the child. I begged him to hurry, because I didn't want to look at Lai Fu Tao's picture without him. When he arrived home, we opened her online file and saw her beautiful face!! I immediately cried, because I knew then and there that she was our daughter. We immediately emailed Hope for Children and requested to review her medical records. The policy is to allow 2 families at a time to review her records for 7 days. At the end of those 7 days, a committee decides which family gets to pursue the adoption!!! No pressure there!!! We gave her file to 2 pediatricians, who felt good about her health (I will discuss her condition later) and we decided to pursue adopting her. So, once again we waited. This time to hear if we would "get" her. The day that the committee was to meet, they found out that Lai Fu Tao had had some necessary surgery, so they decided not to pick a family until we both could review the updated medical information. UGH!! More waiting!! So a week or 2 went by, still no news. One day, on my way home from work, Steve called me and said that he heard that there was only one family reviewing Lai Fu Tao's medical. Panic! Did we get bumped? So I prayed in the car, and Steve made the call to Hope. He found out that the other family backed out!!! Praise God! And more good news - no other family was able to review her records!!! So we found out 2 days later that Lai Fu Tao was our little girl to pursue!! God is so good!! Lai Fu Tao is 14 months younger than our Liz and she has a mild condition (lymph csytic hygroma) that has already been repaired. There is not a doubt in my mind that this little girl was given to us by God. Although I was not able to birth her, she is our daughter all the same. Only God can perform these miracles - and I am grateful to Him!!!

How and Why the Journey Began

We are often asked why we want to adopt. It's hard to explain, but before Steve and I even met, we both had thought of adoption. Our "plan" was to have a couple of biological children, and then adopt. Why? I don't know, except to say that it is something wonderful that God has placed on our hearts. All throughout the scriptures, He tells us to take care of widows and orphans. In James (James 1:27a) it says: "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world". We want to give a home full of love and security to a child who doesn't have one. This is why we have started this journey.

Steve and I first went to an informational meeting at HOPE for Children (our adoption agency) in early December of 2006. We walked out of there convinced that this was what our family needed to do. We wanted our children to be close in age, which meant that we needed to get the process started! At the time, Stephanie had just turned 3, and Elizabeth was 1 1/2 - the perfect time to add another child to our family!!!! At the meeting we learned that there was about an 18 month waiting time from when all of the paperwork is submitted to the Chinese adoption agency and when you actually receive your referral (the picture and information about your child). All of this really meant that it would be at least 2 years before we could travel to China, so, you see, it wasn't too early to start planning for daughter #3 (Ha! Ha!)! There was one way that we could travel sooner - that was to find a child on the Waiting Child List....this list has children with various special needs, including (but not limited to) children with cleft lips and palates, heart conditions, missing limbs, hepatitis, etc. Well, first things first, we needed to start with the ENORMOUS amount of paper work (i.e. paper chasing) - a daughter would come. So Steve and I began to track down birth certificates, marriages licenses, scheduled physicals, worked on financial spreadsheets - it was crazy and very time consuming. We seriously began this paper chasing process at the end of January 2007, and were told that a new Waiting Child List could come out anytime. So we waited and worked on paperwork and completed our home study visits. Finally, in April, we had all of our "stuff" together and we had only one piece of the puzzle left before our dossier (final product containing all of our paperwork) could be authenticated and sent to China - we needed to get fingerprinted by USCIS (Immigration). Oh, and by the way - still no List! On April 14, 2006, we received a letter in the mail giving us an appointment time for our fingerprints - 11 am on April 25! We were very excited to finish our puzzle. We made it to the fingerprinting office in downtown Atlanta, and stood in line for our turn. When we made it to the door, the guard put us in another line on the other side of the door. Little did we know that this was the "turn away line"! We were told that even though we had an appointment time in writing, that they had overbooked and we would have to come back another day, or we could go to their main office (20 miles away) and ask to be seen that day. Such drama!! Well, we went to the main office - we had to! Our girls were at a friend's house, and who knew what would happen next time - the same thing, probably! Thank the Lord, that this worked! The main office gave permission to the fingerprinting department to do our fingerprints that day (along with about 7 other couples who did the same thing that we did!). That was just God! So, despite some minor complications, our fingerprinting was completed! The last piece of the paperwork - finished!!!! When our adoption agency received this final approval, they had our paperwork (dossier) authenticated and we were DTC (dossier to China) on June 7, 2007!!!